Is my enneagram number the reason I’m still single?

So here’s the situation. I turn 35 in four months. I haven’t been in a relationship or even dated anyone in nine years, which, depending on your worldview, might seem really sad to you. But let’s pretend you’re not a Lebanese grandma. Or a Lebanese taxi driver. Or any Lebanese person for that matter. 

I’m going to say something that might possibly make me sound self-absorbed, but I don’t at all mean it that way: I’ve been on the receiving end of a lot of rejection over the years, and I just do not understand why. I mean, I have my sh*t together, I’m reasonably attractive, I’m emotionally low maintenance (holler!), and while I very much enjoy the finer things in life, I’m used to paying for all of that myself. So why are the men making themselves scarce?

Is it because I’m also decisive and willful and honest? Is it because I don’t approach the negotiating table already having reduced my demands? Or is it because I’m not easily impressed or controlled? I swear, I must have a “bugger off” sign on my forehead that I did not put there.

I was absent when my work colleagues went through an Enneagram training in which they all took the test to identify their numbers. Apparently I didn’t need to be present to take the test, because basically everyone immediately identified me as an 8 (“the challenger”). I guess I’m not an enigma. 

I suppose I didn’t do myself any favors by moving to a Middle Eastern country in which men love blondes but not necessarily blondes who challenge them. When I first arrived, everyone told me to brace myself as I was sure to get lots of male attention. Two years on, I barely get side glances. Which honestly I’m okay with, because it must get really tiring after a while. Not that I would know. 

I’ve been on two dates in these two years. One with a man who is perfectly good and decent but not at all my type, and one with a guy who is entirely my type, but perhaps imperfectly good and decent. If you’re that second guy and you happen to be reading this, I’m still interested. I don’t want someone who is squeaky clean, just someone who is real and who won’t fall off his chair the moment I ask him a probing question. 

Also, please tell me you don’t live with your mother…